Tuesday, June 30, 2009

In defence of Bleached Blondes

Ever since I bleached my hair more or less platinum blonde, I've been getting all sorts of CRAP comments.

It's weird because for the longest time I've had my hair sorta really light brown but just not quite blonde yet, and nobody gave two hoots.


Oh, here's an obviously Chinese girl!

But once it crossed the threshold from caramel to 'blonde' blonde, people start all sorts of accusations.

I am trying to be an angmoh! I am abandoning my Chinese roots! Xiaxue you are an insecure, self-hating disgusting heritage ditcher!

This is pissing me off SO FUCKING BAD.


FUCK YOU ALL.


Firstly, GET OVER YOURSELF. It's just a muthafucking hair colour.

Do Chinese people typically have brown/red hair? NO THEY DON'T!

We have BLACK HAIR.

And then like a half of the Asian female population in Singapore have dyed BROWN hair - nobody says anything!

Having BROWN hair is as un-Asian as having Blonde hair isn't it?


Or so are you trying to say that there is a DEGREE to which you can abandon your "roots"?

DYEING BROWN NOT HIDING BLACK MEH?

And oh, I've had my hair black, varieties of brown, ash, green, red (long ago), pink, and BLONDE.

When I was all the other colours, you mean I wasn't trying to act angmoh and suddenly now I have a change in personality and decided to?

I'd tell you why so few people have bleached blonde hair.

- It destroys your hair.
- It doesn't look good on everyone. Not saying it does on me, but I like it.
- It is incredibly expensive to maintain. Mine is sponsored.
- It is a wild colour and schools and most office jobs won't allow it.


And that's why it is so special - and I love attention so I want to be special!

It's just a bloody hair colour and just because I like that colour doesn't mean I necessarily hate being Chinese!

In fact, as my URL so proudly proclaims, I love being Chinese, and I love being Singaporean. My parents are fully Chinese and I've never claimed otherwise.

As for the coloured lens, plenty of other chicks wear them too, purely because everyone else has black irises and it's BORING. Nose job? Anyone who saw my old nose won't deny that I needed one. Angmoh boyfriend? Had him for 3 years before I had blonde hair.

I hate the accusations that come with my decision to be a bleached blonde. So for the last time, I AM NOT TRYING TO BE ANYTHING. (Maybe except special.) I just LIKE THE COLOUR!

Just like I like pink. It doesn't have a deeper meaning than that.

Why the fuck should I be pressured to stay with my black hair when I know I look boring (and imho, ugly and greasy) in black hair?

Just to look Chinese? Well fuck you again. I'm trying to look like a Chinese Albino. You happy now? Not abandoning roots now am I?

Anyway, part of the reason for this tirade is due to a fucker called BRADLEY FARLESS.

One day, I was having dinner with Mike at a food court in Pasir Ris when Bradley was also eating there.

He then blogged this:



Firstly, he doesn't know who I am. I was basically an innocent stranger to him, albeit a stranger who intruded on his opinion about Asians keeping their hair colour.

Didn't anyone tell him that it's incredibly rude to snap someone's photo and blog shit about them?

He didn't even have the decency to mosaic my face.

And secondly, after posting up my photo, he started to ACCUSE ME.

He presumed that I was trying to look white. Excuse me but where is your proof of that? Do you know me that well?

Secondly he presumed that Mike loved me because I looked white. He doesn't know BALLS about our relationship. Look at him go!

His whole entry reeked of the presumption that white men come to Singapore for Asian girls or that White men like Asian girls. I'm sorry Bradley, not every white dude is as racist as you.

AND WHAT IS THIS PHILOSOPHICAL RUBBISH ABOUT ASIAN GIRLS LOOKING GOOD BECAUSE THEY ARE AND LOOK ASIAN??

What the fuck is that? Does that even make any sense? It's like saying Fat chicks look good because they are fat and look fat. WTF??

Fuck you.

Never mind this first entry of his. Afterward, someone told me who I was, and this made him spew a SECOND blog entry.

Mind you, I did nothing to him personally.





Started off by saying I look like shit. You know, LOADS OF PEOPLE LOOK LIKE SHIT. Stephen Hawking, for one, is not a looker either, although he is smart as hell. Why aren't you criticizing his looks?

Oh, I get it. It's because you don't like me.

That's right.

Well.

You ain't much of a looker YOURSELF:


At least I'm not bald at the age of 28.


Imagine someone looking like THAT calling you ugly. Angry not??

And where's his penis? Must be tiny.

Continuation of his blog entry:



This loser with probably less than 100 readers on his SHITASS BLOG per day is trying to teach me how to blog!!

Hilarious and buay paiseh much??

My English is crap. And I don't do balance or moderation, but guess what? I am still the top blogger in Singapore so you can suck on my balls!


"Photos should be used to augment content" - Advice from a loser. Funny! I should listen to him. He sounds like he has been blogging for ages with much success.

Oh and for some reason, he seems to have taken issue with my Chipster Advertorial, naively thinking I've got nothing better to do than to blog about potato chips.

My dear, I was paid THOUSANDS for that entry by a reputable MNC. If you think I've nothing better to do than to go blog something, think again. Retard.





You know, I find the second last sentence particularly enlightening.

Listen, Bradley found that I made him feel
better about himself as a person.



Normally I am not so cruel as to highlight a loser's inadequacies so harshly, but hey, you asked for it.

I did more research into this fucker's life and I found out a lot more about him.

He was originally from Alaska and was in the army till he finally quit it.

He is presumably mixed. Dad's white mom's dunno what:


His parents

His wife is Filipino and never graduated from college, and neither did he.

For some reason, both of them are not from Singapore yet decided to reside here.




In April, he posted this blog entry up.


This loser, there is no other word for it, has been jobless for almost a year
.


He has been living in Singapore with his wife.

AND PRESUMABLY HAS HIS WIFE PROVIDING FOR HIM.

Unless he has some trust fund which I doubt so, but either way, what sort of man at 28 does not work?

He lives in a sad dingy rented room in Pasir Ris at $600 with a Singaporean host family.


And there he goes, typing shit about girls online just like you'd expect any other sad loser would. It's so stereotypical it's almost laughable. Hey dude, why not look for a job instead of writing advice to bloggers?


I was looking at his tweets. He typically sleeps around 5am and wakes up after noon. Does that sound like a guy who is TRYING HARD to look for a job?

IMHO, only lazy, useless, unambitious bums who leech off their kins can be jobless for so long. Can't find a job? Try MacDonalds! Or are you too good for that?

Well, maybe you are vastly over-estimating your self-worth. :)

At the age of 19 Bill Gates set up his own software company. Hell, even I at 19 was starting to get press and making my mark in the world.

At the age of 28 most men are already building their careers, building their families.

At 28 all he has is a bald pate, and ugly cat lady as a wife (more about that later), and NOTHING TO HIS NAME.

His only claim to fame is that a semi-famous blogger once blogged about him.

I don't want to go on about how ACCOMPLISHED I am in contrast to that useless lump because it's arrogance.

But does he have the rights to comment anything about me? No.

Calling me shallow and stupid? If you so deep and clever, where are you in life? PRECISELY.

Really embarrassing to have a chick you are insulting earn way more than you do. Me and Paris Hilton both.



Anyway, never mind these two blog entries he made about me.


After these are written, I was still clueless because obviously I don't read his blog.

Then, the fucker had the nerve to @TheXiaxue me on a tweet, saying that my twitter updates are BORING.

(For those of you who don't know, if you put an @ before a person's nickname, the person can see your tweet as a 'reply')



This led me to his blog. I then read the first two entries as posted.

I retaliated by tweeting that his wife is uglier than I am.

Of course, this fucker wanting hits for his site, wrote A THIRD blog entry about me, and here it is:









Typical.

When I said his wife is uglier than me, he pulled out my old Maxim photoshoot. Congrats, you found my ugliest photo in existance. So?



FIRST
off, I have no qualms about what he called "dragging his wife into the picture".

As you all can see, the wife also left a barrage of comments about me prior to my tweet about her. She said I'm stupid and made remarks about my site. So is she innocent? She is not.

Secondly, if you want to say I am ugly out of NOWHERE, then I can also say your wife/mom is ugly if I want to.

Your remark about me being ugly is UNPROVOKED, so why can't I make UNPROVOKED remarks about your family?

Sounds FAIR, doesn't it?

ONE FOR ONE.


AND THIRDLY, here are his wife's tweets about me.







Oh, so this bitch wants to get into this too!!


Since she and her husband are so adamant that she is better-looking than me, here are a few of her choice photos for you to see:



























What crap about it being the end of the day and his wife was tired... I'm sorry but it seems as if she looks typically even greasier and uglier!

Oh and that photo taken without my permission was also at the end of the day with me in ratty clothes and no make-up on. I DON'T SEE ME LETTING MYSELF GO LIKE THAT!

You think I chose her ugliest photos and tried to embarrass her? Don't take my word for it, feel free to check out her MYSPACE profile's photo albums before she shuts it down.

I didn't want to blog anything about this fucker despite him writing 3 blog entries about me. Since he is such a sad little loser I thought I'd let him off.

But then, up till yesterday, the fucker was still steadily tweeting a stream of nasty shit about me.





I presume he either really hates me or just badly wants me to blog about him. If it's the latter here's your wish granted!!

And here's the "WHORE" photo in question:



Do I look like a whore?


Pic credit Jessica

I was wearing a cute lilac M)phosis romper for Christ's sake. Whores do not wear rompers coz they are so difficult to fuck in, ya know?




Fucking losers. Hey Margee, do your colleagues at NTUC Income (if there is where you work according to the lanyard) know you have a loser of a husband?


Fucktards. Get the fuck out of Singapore.


UPDATE:

The cat lady twittered 2 new tweets about me:

xiaxue top blogger? keep telling yourself that fake blond.


Funny leh! This sorta thing need to argue one meh?

Tempting to post the $10,000 cheque photo again. Tempting. Won't. Am a girl with self-restrain. Shall be more humble.

And the second tweet whining and whimpering about how she is 8 months short of finishing med school or something.

HAHAHAHAHA!

Never finish also can talk about it one ah? Like that I am 8 years short of finishing a PHD! How? Clever not???

I thought only the husband is a loser but she's slowly going on par!

Which is more loserish, never starting something, or starting something halfway and giving up/failing??


Always finish what you start honey!

*plants big L on forehead*

Almost a doctor, huh? If so, why are you still living in a dingy little flat doing customer service? Go and be a goddamn doctor if you can make it! Betcha can't! And till then, stop claiming to be a doctor and stfu!

And I'm not 'crying', silly. Why should I? I'm rich. MUAHAHAHA! Not rich rich, but richer than YOU, a half-fucked doctor!!

Oh and OF COURSE... I was right about the dude having a small penis and no balls. He deleted all blog entries related to me.

He was the one daring me to blog about him and now this!

If it's possible, I lost even more respect for him! Stand by your fucking opinions, fuckface! You can't afford to add SPINELESS to your long list of bad traits!!

Second UPDATE:

He deleted whole blog. Nice!

I'm totally happy today.


p/s: I am not afraid of giving hits to him because shitty bloggers will never be able to maintain it. :)

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